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Girls and women, in general, do not tend toward physical violence like boys and men. So, while it is often emphasized how often boys need a father to raise them into a man, this is true when it is time, but in the earlier years it is through the motherly bond that a boy learns lessons he will need as a man.
He learns the truth of love through her gaze and care first. In other words, a man makes a man, but we want more than a man — we want Christian gentlemen — and it is the mother that puts the gentle in a gentleman.step mom and step son force part 1
A daughter grows more like the mother as she becomes a woman. But a boy grows more unlike her. He clings more and more to the men and friends that he will be like.
He especially clings to the father during adolescence. This does not mean it grows less loving or close. But at some point they begin to know each other as man and mother and not boy and mother. When the separation does not occur, an element of boyhood remains.
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This can be hard for mothers, because they have a special place for their boys in their hearts. Marriage requires the total self-gift, so he cannot retain a boy-like affection for his mother while giving himself totally to his wife. A hard new truth This separation is hard for mothers. This is also why and when the tension builds: This becomes a greater problem if the son does in fact remain overly attached to his mother.
Naturally, she had strange feelings toward the new young bride that had displaced her. Who needed Playboy when I had my mother? She was not interested in my body; she only wanted me to be interested in her body. I call what happened with my mother incest and not rape. There is a big debate among psychologist as to whether a man can be raped.
Perhaps this is true but for me it was incest. My mother waited for me to take the first move. She did, of course, present herself to me in an attractive way but in waiting for me to make the first move she smeared me with the guilt. If I had not made the first move then she would have ignored me and eventually I would have been homeless. But in the process of becoming homeless my mother would have insured that my father and all others around her would have thought it was my fault.
My mother, in public, is a regal figure and has fooled most people and her opinion holds weight. And I needed female attention so why not pay attention to my mother. The rewards were great-up to a point.
I was spoiled and spoiled and spoiled. But my mother would sometimes have to stop spoiling me because the situation would be too obvious to everyone else.
Though I gave her emotional security, my father gave her financially security to a point, but much more than I could and so she had to please him for this reason also. My mother taught me adultery.
This was the worst thing about the incest. If I had not been emotionally involved and had somehow just remained aloof then it would have been different. My parents taught me to go into any other relationship and stick my noise in where it did not belong. I would go into other marriages and start talking deeply with the woman about very personal things concerning her husband-things that were none of my business.
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Again, this caused many problems with others and sometimes men would become very angry with me. There were women, as well, who would avoid me, who knew what was in my heart.
Sexually I went far beyond women, for my mother had introduced me to enough feminity for a lifetime. I was not only revolted by women-I was bored! But that is another story. Life, though, teaches us many things and with the help of my God, a different kind of father than my own, I have straightened my life out.
I no longer speak with my parents.